Float on

We like to think we're in control of our lives most of the time. We decide what time to get up in the morning, what type of cereal we eat, what clothes we choose to wear, where to go and what to do with our time. But all of these only provide you with options, and just by having options doesn't mean you have control.

The first thing we have no control over is our youth. You don't get to choose your parents and the way they impart their values into your mind. You don't get to choose what school you go to and what most of your activities are going to be. Some are lucky and their upbringing is balanced and prepares them for the rest of their lives as best as possible, while others spend most of their days trying to fight and challenge the limitations of their not-so-fortunate emotional baggage.

You don't get to choose your genes. People often underestimate the importance of their genetic background and how much it affects them in almost all areas of their life. You don't get to choose your body. You can only accept it and try to improve it. You don't get to choose your health, you can only influence it. You don't get to choose how long you live, even though you like to think you're doing the best you can to live longer.

The people in your life are not in your control either. You like to think that you chose your friends, but chances are that there are types of people you just click with, and the circumstances were just so right that you ended up as pals. Your co-workers, colleagues, family and friends of friends, are definitely given to you by circumstance, you get no choice as to who gets to be around you most of the time.

Attraction is the most important thing that we completely lack control of. Chemistry. The moment your eyes meet for the first time. The sound of their voice. That thing you like that they also like ("Huh, what a nice coincidence" - bet you've said that to yourself before). You don't get to choose who attracts you, maybe that's why so many people often like the wrong person, or maybe, better said not the right person. Once that moment happened, once the switch was turned on in your head, there's no going back. No matter who the one you like happens to become, or who you find out they already were, most of the time the image you have created of them in your mind will linger on for a long time. Perhaps this is why so many people decide to continue living in toxic or dead-end relationships, or why it's so difficult to let go of a loved one after a break up.

 Why aren't we all going insane then? Because deep down we don't want to be in control. It's too much responsibility. That's why religion is such influential in our world, we like to think that there's a great force out there, pulling all the strings. That's why losing all control over yourself when you're in love with somebody feels so good. We're all just drops in the ocean, touching each others lives while the tides pull us in whatever direction they happen to be going.