Fear

I hate my fear. I hate that it makes me do things that I don't want to do, when I'm not ready to do them, with the sole motivator being the desire to not suffer the consequences. I hate being constrained and only having one option, of acting when I'm at my most vulnerable state, because fear makes you feel weak.

I hate that fear forces me to grow when I am not ready to grow, because the only other alternative would be stagnation, and stagnation leads to nothingness. I've grown out of love for what I want to do and I've grown out of fear of what I don't want to happen, but you sometimes don't get to choose. Evolution (or growth) is never intentional in nature. It is most often violent, ugly and destructive. At the end, only the strongest and those who adapt will survive.

Perhaps this is why I hate fear, because humanity has generally tried to protect and save its weak and less adapted members. We know that growth can happen in absence of a destructive action and we try to help those who cannot adapt as quick, so they can survive today and evolve tomorrow, for evolution has become an intentional act in humans.

Man no longer adapts to the environment, but adapts the environment to himself. Does that mean that evolution has stopped? It's enough to take a look at the world around to realize that the obvious answer is no, it hasn't, it has just taken another form. Evolution has evolved. Fear then has become an apparently obsolete instinct, something that most of the time only hinders progress for most people.

There are still those among us who only use fear as a motivator, either for themselves or as a tool to control others, and perhaps because of this reason, fear will never be truly suppressed. As an individual, the only way to fight fear is through love for knowledge, education and spiritual growth.

Many think that hate is the antithesis of love, but it's not; fear is. You can choose to do something because you love to do it, or because of fear of the potential consequences and never feel true satisfaction. You can be in love with somebody and accept the total loss of control that comes with it, or be afraid to let yourself go and never experience those true feelings. Fear is a lie, love is the truth.

Fear will always be with us, but it can be tamed, it can be handled and brought to its knees, because it's just an illusion, a mirage that is neither here nor there, not now and not then, it is just an ephemeral presence in the mind. And our mind can be our best friend and our worst enemy, if we let it. The burden of choice then lies on us. Say hi to fear when it comes to visit, wave to it, let it know you recognize it, and continue along your path. It will always chase you from behind, but you know what they say when you're one step ahead: nobody remembers those who comes in second place.